@Tyrese via Instagram screenshot

His wife wasn’t pregnant. Jada and Will Smith never sent him money. He’s not broke. Russell Simmons did not fly him to a yoga retreat. The psychiatric drugs made him lie.

Tyrese Gibson came clean to his social media followers hoping to see him cry fans on Tuesday about his weird Tyrone Biggums-like behavior over the past month. The Root would have reported on it earlier, but we stopped following his Instagram account now that he is all happy and seemingly stable. Who wants to see that?

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He blamed the pregnancy falsehood on the medication that he had been taking (I didn’t know you could get a prescription for crystal meth). After a very public but admittedly hilarious breakdown surrounding his family court battle over custody of his daughter, Tyrese blamed “psychiatric meds” for his tantrum.

In the same video, he spoke of empty pockets because of a waning career, child support and legal fees, but rejoiced in a later Instagram post when he claimed that moguls Will and Jada Smith gave him $5 million. He praised the couple for helping him escape his financial difficulties, especially since his wife was pregnant.

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“I’ve already mentioned that there was a few talks with the Smiths,” Tyrese wrote in the statement. “Those meds made me jump out there and speak on monies that never came in- I’ve already again apologized to them privately and publicly for everything.”

Tyrese wants you to know that he’s not broke, either: “I owe no one any money on any level matter of fact I just took care of both of my lawyers fully 108k for my lawyer and almost 20k for Shaylas lawyer. I could never give what I don’t have. Smart folks do the math!”

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I must be dumb as fuck because I don’t understand what the hell he’s talking about. I was always bad at word problems, though.

The Baby Boy star says he had a camera crew follow him around during this camera ordeal and he’s creating a documentary, for which I have already checked Fandango to buy tickets because I’ve never seen anyone smoke crack. No, I’m not saying Tyrese smokes crack. I’m saying, from the previews I watched on Instagram, that the character he plays in the documentary might be a crackhead. I don’t know, I haven’t read the script.

Somehow this all has to do with a combination of his medication and being a Capricorn. I’m not a medical professional or an astrologer, so I can’t vouch for this. I do know that The Root’s news editor, Breanna Edwards, is a Capricorn, and I have never seen her crying snot into a cellphone camera, but then again, I haven’t known her very long.

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Remember, there is nothing funny about mental illness. But we haven’t seen an official diagnosis of Tyrese, so it’s OK just this one time. Plus, he just said he was lying, so ...

Unless, or maybe, as Senior Editor Stephen Crockett pointed out, “I was high on psych meds” is the new “I was hacked.”

Someone should have told Matt Lauer.

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